It just seems incredible that any sane person could be so fond of a sport that puts their body through such gruelling trials. From clunky, painful ski boots to severe hangovers and everything in between, our beloved winter sports of skiing and snowboarding are definitely not for the faint of heart. It goes without saying that we brave souls will continue putting up with it all in order to get our fix of glistening white mountains, fresh powder snow and pure adrenaline. But just for once, let’s all take a moment to acknowledge the harsh suffering we go through on a skiing or snowboarding holiday. #worthit
1. Ski boot pain
The hard plastic constricts your blood supply, making your toes fall asleep and turning the slightest of sock-creases into an agonising instrument of torture. Beginners need only attempt one or two steps before they, too, will realise the sadistic invention that is Ski Boots. Luckily, there is a fairly recent innovation that helps your feet be more comfortable and lets you get on with enjoying your day. It’s called Snowboard Boots.
2. Ice pain
If you thought ice skating was bad, try skiing and snowboarding. Going a million miles an hour through an icy blizzard only to spiral out of control and end up in a bruised mess of skis, boots and poles, you’ll finally appreciate the draw of quieter pastimes like curling or knitting.
3. Button lift pain
This one will have male skiers cringing – whoever invented the button lift must have been a female, right? Riding up with the lift squishing uncomfortably on places that were never meant to be squished... ouch. And that’s if you’re lucky enough not to wipe out in the first place.
4. Chairlift pain
Beware of loose objects, inadequate braking ability or clumsy people in general on the chairlift – and be doubly wary if any of these things apply to you. Getting on and off the lifts requires navigating such a myriad of hazards that it’s a wonder anybody manages to do it at all.
5. Muscle pain
This is especially salient on the first ski holiday of the year, when you’ve not used your skiing and snowboarding muscles in ten long months. Happily, you can find solace throughout the season by enjoying the sight of the new skiers and snowboarders who overestimate their skills and give it all they’ve got, only to suffer severely for it the next day.
6. Head pain
No, we don’t mean from falling on your head. Actually, it’s a (pseudo-) scientific fact that headaches on ski holidays are more frequently the result of après-ski sessions, after which you wake up with your head pounding. What’s your go-to cure for this common malady?
7. Leg pain
Before lunch:
Ha, I’m in better shape than I thought!
After lunch:
Oh my god, I need a doctor. And a crane. Do they airlift people out of here?
After a long break and a nice hot meal, it’s hard to head back out into the elements. Even worse when your muscles seem to have solidified and you can barely walk, let alone ski or snowboard!
8. Backside pain
This one is for you, snowboarders. Beginners especially will know the pain of landing repeatedly on your bottom. How sadistic to invent a sport where both your feet are strapped tightly to a board! If you’re wise you’ll distribute the pain by alternately landing on your knees.
9. Arm pain
Skiing has a magnificent way of working seemingly every muscle in your body, meaning even your arms aren’t spared. But sore arms are worst in beginner snowboarders, who are constantly forced to push themselves back up after they fall again and again and again.
10. Farewell pain
Despite the physical trials and tribulations of your ski holiday, the hardest part is saying goodbye. You’ve called this mountain home for the last week and you’ll miss the delicious food, the snow-capped mountain peaks and the lively après-ski. If you can’t wait until next season for your next ski holiday, you can assuage the pain by visiting the Snowplaza website and reliving the ski holiday atmosphere!